Gets Better Everyday

I still think its damn funny because while i do other random things, i have millions of thoughts running through the head.. i filter them while they come and sort of collect a few which i think are worthy enough to put it here.. but as soon as i see the pretty blank space where you can write a new post, whooosh!!!

Today, a weird thing knocked in the head...while heading back home from sigma mall, while i was in the auto, i told the rick guy to take a u-turn at this one point.. and i continued to give him an explanation as to why i 'told' him to take a u-turn but in my head..(the reason i gave him an explanation is because one of the previous times when i was headed back and kept directing the auto guy, hes like madam i know the way..) and while i was talking to the former rick guy in the head, for a second, i couldn't differentiate the fact that i told him to take a u-turn or spoke that also in my head!

www.dictionary.com has become my new best friend...sometimes i look up things that i do know that i know...

There is a certain amount of depersonalization...i do not get excited for the most things that i think i would get excited for...

Hey i have another best friend...My Ego...the freak is damn persistent..won't budge only...we have tiffs, lot of them, but because the situation calls for it and as soon as its over, it will come running back and hug my thoughts so tightly that i feel guilty that i disappointed my ego...

I now, get scared of people who talk around me..what if the next word or sentence they are going to say is something that i don't understand or know..i am damn conscious of spellings, vocabulary and the best - pronunciations..

The last weekend was a long one because of independence day.. did absolutely nothing fruitful of course, felt useless and bored but one phone call totally random made my day..

Sometimes i blame my family background, sometimes Dubai, sometimes i think its just an articulation problem and other times i am not sure what i thought which came and went and i didn't even realize..

Its irritating.. i do things and can almost imagine the consequences..most of the times, the expected happens...other times its different... i still do those things..like if it has come, it has to be done.. yayi!! i am back rhyming for a bit...

Its damn funny..right now i know what i am thinking but it doesn't bloody flow out of the brain area and reach the fingers so that they can type.. but they still type assuming this is what it is...

Repeat..Repetitions..Repeat...Repetitions... and the usual, i see Meenal standing over my head and just smiling..

Ssshhh...Calm!

Neutrality.
Stress.
Isolation.
Ego.
Thoughts.
Naivety.
Hut.
Relations.
Uncertainity.

Open your palms child :)